Raising children can be very challenging, but it can be even worse when you are raising them within two different cultures. Children will naturally do what their friends and peers are doing regardless of their culture or religion. Behaviors are learned and children mimic each other. Some immigrant families want their children to have their culture and values, but they are raising them in a culture that is very different from the one that they grew up in. Some children adjust very well, and others feel confused or find it difficult to fit into either culture. The parents want them to live in a country but they do not want them to be attached to their norms and values.

This can be difficult for both parents and children. In North America children can argue with their parents and refuse to do what parents want them to do. In some countries, a child will be scolded or punished for this behavior. They are raised to respect and obey their parents and do not question or challenge them. I hear parents say to their Canadian children, ?you are not a Canadian, you are Indian or Grenadian or Colombian? just to name a few. They may speak both languages, but they are socialized within a Canadian culture that is very multicultural. However, the children are Canadian who have another cultural ancestry. With this said, I find it very difficult to see my children do things that are contrary to my beliefs and morals. I believe that children should love and respect their parents and parents must do the same.

There must be an opportunity for families to set aside time to talk and be connected to each other. Children should feel secure and be able to share their thoughts with their parents. In this way, parents can understand what is going on in their lives. My children had to understand why I will not allow them to have ?sleepovers?. I could not imagine having my most precious gifts behind closed doors with strangers or people I do not have complete knowledge of who they are. Because my children went to school with their children, that does mean that their parents are qualified to have my children sleepover at their houses. The question I had to deal with was ?can X sleepover at my house?? The answer was always ?yes? because I have full control of who is with my children. This is just one example of the many things I had to explain to my children.

As children grow, develop and understand the culture, parents are learning too. I was very active in volunteering in many settings to gain knowledge of my new country. It is difficult for many, but parents can learn parenting skills and understand the struggle and challenges that children encounter as they try to live within a dual culture. Parents must be very open-minded and try to see the good in both cultures. We cannot change and we will never allow our children to be disrespectful to us. However, we must learn effective parenting and positive discipline. It may be very difficult because we want to raise our children, the way we were raised even if we resent some aspects of our upbringing. Children must learn to embrace the positive aspects of both cultures because it gives them a sense of identity. A strong identity will give them positive self-esteem. Although parenting in a dual cultural can be difficult at times, children can learn a lot from both cultures and they can be more develop empathy for others.